I paid this morning.

Like all mornings, afternoons, and evenings. For the chance at two minutes. Alone. In the bathroom.

These kinds of charges always sneak up on me. Like most things you enjoy until you realize there’s a charge.

Kind of like when you’re 11 and don’t realize the chocolate in the mini bar gets counted.

Or the first time you meet a toilet paper thief bathroom fluffer and thinks she’s just a super-nice lady offering everyone gum and perfume.

Or when you sample every last sweet bread they plop on your breakfast table in Mexico (sneezes and all, anything uneaten goes to the next table).

I don’t use my parent’s money anymore, get out much, or pay in pesos.

Today’s currency for enjoyment, peace, or getting things done is: TODDLER

Have you experienced this in the world market? I think it’s used everywhere.

Everything costs more in TODDLER. And the Momma Minute is not holding strong against it.

Today I paid with the destruction of the master closet. The only difference being that I knew the rate of exchange for those precious minutes when she shut the door between the bathroom and herself. But I still got sucked in!

Forget the exchange rate, try to take a loan out in this currency, say an extra minute or two? You won’t be able to afford the skyrocketing interest rates!

It just keeps escalating.

And don’t turn your back on the markets. You THINK you know what’s going on, like when you think she’s in the kitchen ripping a community magazine she pulled from the recycle bin earlier in the day but it’s your lighthouse calendar ripped to shreds.

You gotta stay current! (Don’t worry we only lost March through May.)

You’re not exempt at your desk…

Or in your living room…

You’re not exempt while working on special projects…

Or in your kitchen…especially not in your kitchen…

You’re never exempt in your kitchen…

In fact, this something that has been trending for awhile now…

I file regular complaints with the DH commission and I get some relief but nothing that has shown any signs of stabilizing this economy.

That’s because the DH never encounters this in Washington…

Or this when home on recess…

This whole thing…

it’s usury.

-RM